Snacks and Shit

#509

"So suck my dick while I take a shit and do this crossword puzzle."
- Eminem, Threesixfive

I think it's mostly just the way you put it that makes it sound so fucking unappealing. Also, who would actually keep working on the crossword after the blowjob started?

That reminds me of something...

Filed under: Too many activities

#469

"Ate pussy in the shower for the first time last week."

-Plies, Feel Like Fuckin

It's Christmas Eve. Plies has been invited to a friend's house because he's alone. His friend's dad asks him what he's been up to.

"You know, a little this, a little that. Ate pussy in the shower for the first time last week, so..."

"Get out of my house."

Filed under: Not our business / Worst conversation starter



Posted by Chris Macho

Listen/Buy "Feel Like Fuckin"

#460

"By all means I keep my balls clean."

-Devin the Dude, Kush Is My Cologne by Gucci Mane

What do you mean "by all means"? This isn't that hard. Like, just wash them.

Filed under: Not our business



Posted by Chris Macho

Listen/Buy "Kush Is My Cologne"

#459

"Checkmate, nigga."

-Lil Flip, I'm Back

Filed under: Got kicked out of chess club



Posted by Chris Macho

Listen/Buy "I'm Back"

#425

"Everytime your bitch burp, you smell my balls in the air."
Crooked I, The One by Slaughterhouse

"Okay, which one of you chicks was with Crooked last night?"

Filed under: Completely gross / So immature



Posted by Chris Macho

Listen/Buy "The One"

#366

"All black Maybach, I'm sitting in the asshole."
- Lil Wayne, Maybach Music 2 by Rick Ross

This is a really bad description of sitting in a car. And when I say bad, I mean terrible. In fact, there's really only one way to say you're sitting in a car, and it's not "I'm sitting in the asshole."

Filed under: Doesn't know how to use words to say something / Bad around children / Crass for no reason



Posted by Chris Macho   

#358

"Tell the women in your family to suck my dick."
- Sheek Louch, Mighty D-Block

No one would deliver this message... ever.

"Hey mom, you know Sheek Louch?"
"No."
"Well, call Aunt Diane here's the deal..."

CUT TO: an establishing shot of a house. We can hear a mother screaming with disgust.

Filed under: SO crass and disrespectful



Posted by Chris D'Elia   

#356

"All my Westside bitches, throw it up, put a balloon inside your pussy, queef, and blow it up."
- Eminem, Medicine Ball

Hey Eminem,

Stop trying to out-disgusting yourself.

Sincerely,
Everyone

Filed under: Graphically overboard / Stop (please!)



Posted by Chris Macho

#305

'Y'all niggas eat pussy and burp."
- Canibus, Poet Laureate

On behalf of everyone who just read this or have heard this before: "Ew, that's gross. Please stop rapping."

Filed under: Lost my appetite for a while



Posted by Chris Macho   

#291

"Your girl has been landmarked. That means that I marked her. That means that I skeeted sperm all over her twat fur."
- Paul Mussan, Creepin' by Tech N9ne

There are a few definitions here that are completely wrong according to dictionary.com.

Landmark - a mark showing the boundary of a piece of land.
Therefore you cannot "landmark" a girl.

Mark - designate as if by a mark; "This sign marks the border" .
Therefore it does not mean "to skeet sperm on a woman's twat fur."

Filed under: So crass / such a bad student